Profile: Emperor Julius

emperor
photo by Clarabelle Fields

So who is the dashingly handsome Emperor Julius? Want to find out a little more about him before he begins updating the magazine with monthly news from his realm? Read on!

Official name: Julius Augustulus, Emperor of the World

Age: 3.5 years

Breed: domestic shorthair (although he would prefer “domestic tiger”)

Birthplace: on a farm somewhere in mid-Missouri

Favorite foods: Purina brand anything, caramel, and banana cream pie yogurt

Favorite toys: string and sparkly fuzzy balls

Favorite game: chasing string around the kitchen

Favorite past times: stealing things out of trash cans, drinking out of the toilet, and snuggling with humans (not necessarily in that order, but sometimes)

Dislikes: not being fed on time, not being allowed in the trashcans

Best trait: extremely loving

Worst trait: no appreciation for “quiet hours” when the humans want to sleep

Murder tally: two mugs, three vases, one glass thermometer, countless pieces of paper, and maybe one cricket

Life goals: to eventually infiltrate the pantry where his food is kept

 

 

 

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